the shit has hit the fan

Bless me Father, for I have sinned. This is my first confession. Because I am not a Catholic, not even a Christian for that matter. Please don’t freak out Father but I am a Muslim. Don’t worry, I am not a suicide bomber or a terrorist, I’m just an ordinary run-of-the-mill middle-class Muslim guy who is ambivalent towards religion. I don’t usually tell people this Father, but I am not exactly sure what post-modernism is all about. And apparently, the whole Islamist controversy is rooted in the legacy of post-modernism or so it said in some fancy shmancy book my boss was reading and which I told him I had read too but I had just googled a summary. So anyhow, I don’t know what the big deal is. You’re probably wondering why I am here Father. See the thing is I did something a little odd. I became a chauffer Father. You may wonder why that is odd; there are so many chauffeurs out there. But you see Father, I am the only chauffeur I know who has a Ph.D. In microbiology. And I have a job too. A good job Father, I make good money. So why did I become a chauffeur? I don’t exactly know why Father. I had a month of leave saved up at work and the year was ending so unless I took it, it would go to waste. So I took it. And I had nothing to do. And one morning I saw an advertisement in the paper for a chauffeur. And for some reason I picked up the phone and applied for the job. And got it. I had to play down my credentials though, told them I had flunked out of college. It was so relaxing Father, I didn’t have to worry about anything but traffic, I drove to wherever the company sent me and picked up busy men and dropped them from one anonymous office building to another. And I used to be one of them Father. I used to look at my watch and tap my feet like them. But now I watched them in the rearview mirror and felt superior. Because I didn’t have those worries anymore, I barely had any worries anymore. But today Father it all went wrong. Because I got sent to pick up my boss. From my original job. Where I am supposed to start working again in a week. Luckily I saw him coming towards the car in the rearview mirror and I rant out of the car. And this Church was right there. So I came in here. Do you think he will have called another cab service by now Father?