Wednesday, May 10, 2006
on befriending boys
imagine a conversation between two friends about all the usual unsolvable issues of life and then the point where theres nothing left to say. then comes this conversation:
K says:
i know the appropriate motivational lecture to go here
so you can just say "insert motivational lecture here"
the wavering optimist says (6:39 PM):
hahaha thanks. the lecture is there in my head as well...but...
i feel like those shrinks who advise their patients but are SO caught up in their own unsolvable issues!
K says:
hahahaha
i think we are ALL Like that!!
the wavering optimist says:
totally!
man, we need positive energy! where do i get some from?
K says:
we need to find fresh, uncomplicated people with no problems of their own and burden them with our issues
the wavering optimist says:
yeah.. i think we should befriend guys. they don't mind listening to crazy girls but they're mostly uncomplicated themselves so the focus can be on you
K says:
no thank you
sigh
the wavering optimist says:
why not?
but why?
why? why?
but why no?
K says:
because when you do this, youll be friends with these guys and eventually one of four things will happen:
a) guy will fall for you
b) you will fall for guy
c) your significant other will be jealous of guy and this will create further issues
d) guys significant other will be jealous of you and this will create further issues
the wavering optimist says:
hmmm but if a and b happen won't that be perfect?
K says:
did i not mention that there are also distinct possibilities for a and b?
lets take A
1) guy falls for you but already has a girlfriend, issues ensue
2) guy falls for you but you dont fall for him, issues ensue
3) guy falls for you and you think well we are such good friends itll work out and get swept along and eventually realize its not working and youve ruined a perfectly good friendship
4) it works out and you live happily ever after
chances of 4) happening: 2%
the wavering optimist says:
hmph
fine then.
K says:
hahahaha
the wavering optimist says:
let's not meet anyone
K says:
im not helping am i?
yes, maybe i am being a touch too cynical...but you know i'm right don't you?
imagine a conversation between two friends about all the usual unsolvable issues of life and then the point where theres nothing left to say. then comes this conversation:
K says:
i know the appropriate motivational lecture to go here
so you can just say "insert motivational lecture here"
the wavering optimist says (6:39 PM):
hahaha thanks. the lecture is there in my head as well...but...
i feel like those shrinks who advise their patients but are SO caught up in their own unsolvable issues!
K says:
hahahaha
i think we are ALL Like that!!
the wavering optimist says:
totally!
man, we need positive energy! where do i get some from?
K says:
we need to find fresh, uncomplicated people with no problems of their own and burden them with our issues
the wavering optimist says:
yeah.. i think we should befriend guys. they don't mind listening to crazy girls but they're mostly uncomplicated themselves so the focus can be on you
K says:
no thank you
sigh
the wavering optimist says:
why not?
but why?
why? why?
but why no?
K says:
because when you do this, youll be friends with these guys and eventually one of four things will happen:
a) guy will fall for you
b) you will fall for guy
c) your significant other will be jealous of guy and this will create further issues
d) guys significant other will be jealous of you and this will create further issues
the wavering optimist says:
hmmm but if a and b happen won't that be perfect?
K says:
did i not mention that there are also distinct possibilities for a and b?
lets take A
1) guy falls for you but already has a girlfriend, issues ensue
2) guy falls for you but you dont fall for him, issues ensue
3) guy falls for you and you think well we are such good friends itll work out and get swept along and eventually realize its not working and youve ruined a perfectly good friendship
4) it works out and you live happily ever after
chances of 4) happening: 2%
the wavering optimist says:
hmph
fine then.
K says:
hahahaha
the wavering optimist says:
let's not meet anyone
K says:
im not helping am i?
yes, maybe i am being a touch too cynical...but you know i'm right don't you?
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
A plan most practical
Ned: yeah
and now they are trying to build robots that can empathize :P
me: hahaha
Ned: though I don't think they'll ever manage
me: robots with feelings
Ned: they can probably simulation empathy
me: thats never going to work
Ned: *simulate empathy
Ned: but it won't be the real thing
I am so ready to pick up on CS again
I will blast them
I will blast LUMS some day :P
me: hahaha remember our plan of defacing their website?
Ned: I will build an army of robots that will blast LUMS into oblivion!
me: hahahahaha
Ned: (sorry I just watched the ending of Terminator 3)
me: no empathy for lums!!
Ned: lol!!
NO EMPATHY FOR LUMS!!
me: that can be our motto
our robots will chant it repeatedly while destroying the place
Ned: actually NO LOVE FOR LUMS sounds better
lol!
me: and the repetition will hypnotize the students and teachers as well
Ned: hahahahaha
me: and eventually they will participate in the destruction
Ned: yes indeed!!
me: and we will make a world famous documentary about it
Ned: but who do we hate in LUMS?
me: hahahaha
i dont know
Ned: well I can tell you who I hate
me: teacher x!!!
teacher y!!
Ned: yuppers!!
admin coordinator z
me: mean admin lady
(though she left)
Ned: YES MEAN ADMIN LADY!!!
but yeah she left.
Ned: no, she still comes part-time
but dude she has a kid
we can't kill her
me: oh HO
chalo we will just brainwash her
Ned: listen unfortunately ethics dictate that we can't kill people with kids or grandkids
(did I just say "ethics"?)
me: and fill her up with empathy
she will CRY in empathy everytime someone cant get a course
Ned: lol!!
yes!
listen there has to be some kind of empathy gas
we have to spray LUMS with it
everywhere
we have to fumigate LUMS with empathy gas!
me: hahahaha
turn them all into nampy pamby tree huggers
muhahahaha
Ned: or wait, there is something we could do that is actually practical. we could mix something in people's food and drinks. something that makes them all have ego deaths.
me: what is that now?
Ned: ego deaths that make them turn in spiritually evolved human beings.
not the unfeeling machines they are right now.
me: oh yes ned, this whole scheme is totally practical
Ned: (ego death is what I had on Feb 12, 2005.)
me: while we are at it, can we feed the WHOLE country this food?
Ned: no but this could happen, G.
I mean K! :P
me: i am K!!!
Ned: sowwee
ok naaa
me: tis okay
go see the mail i just forwarded you
Ned: I'm getting confused because of my excitement
K!!
ALL WE NEED IS LSD!!!
me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
thats not sustainable ned
Ned: yes it is
me: we will run out of it too soon
it will wear off
Ned: in controlled doses LSD is very effective
oh you mean that
no it seems to have permanent transformative effects on people
me: REALLY?
Ned: I was reading an article in New Scientist abou tit
*about it
me: i never knew that!
Ned: it's used in psychotherapy, K
me: wow ned
Ned: but psychedelic research was shoved under the rug in the 1970s
this is going to sound conspiracy theory-ish
me: so we just need to slip it into the chicken hawain one night
Ned: they asked him, why is it so hard to get funding for psychedelic research?
and he said, well one of the main reasons is pharmaceutical companies
see, in psychedelic therapy . . .
me: coz the man dont want us to think dude?
Ned: you basically need to administer maybe one, two or max three doses.
and then it's over.
the treatment is over.
it has dramatic effects which can be scary, but are healing.
like a mystical experience.
but the point is, you don't need to keep people on drugs.
which is not what pharmaceutical companies want
they want to keep you on drugs for the rest of your life.
me: bloody bastards
lets fumigate them too!
Ned: YES!!
LET US SPREAD THE LOVE!!
and then we will move to other countries
soon, K, we will rule the world
a brave new world of constantly doped up tree-hugging empathy-filled vegan hippies!!
me: we will have to wear haz mat suits
and we will not move to other countries
Ned: we won't?
me: we will begin with america
and get them to give us money to make a space shuttle on a satellite
and then launch empathy gas all over the world with the flick of a switch
Ned: oh wow!!
that is brilliant-e.
me: haina
Ned: but we will have to get George W really doped up on LSD first.
me: im such a practical planner
he will be our first "client"
Ned: heheheh.
me: did i mention we charge a small fee for this service?
so we are horrendously rich by the end of it
and can go to grad school
Ned: YES!!!
and we can kick the Fulbright!
me: via personal jet plane
exxxactly
hahahaha
Ned: and say, we don't need you, nanny-nanny-boo-boo!
me: hahahahaha
i think im going to blog this conversation
Ned: yeah
and now they are trying to build robots that can empathize :P
me: hahaha
Ned: though I don't think they'll ever manage
me: robots with feelings
Ned: they can probably simulation empathy
me: thats never going to work
Ned: *simulate empathy
Ned: but it won't be the real thing
I am so ready to pick up on CS again
I will blast them
I will blast LUMS some day :P
me: hahaha remember our plan of defacing their website?
Ned: I will build an army of robots that will blast LUMS into oblivion!
me: hahahahaha
Ned: (sorry I just watched the ending of Terminator 3)
me: no empathy for lums!!
Ned: lol!!
NO EMPATHY FOR LUMS!!
me: that can be our motto
our robots will chant it repeatedly while destroying the place
Ned: actually NO LOVE FOR LUMS sounds better
lol!
me: and the repetition will hypnotize the students and teachers as well
Ned: hahahahaha
me: and eventually they will participate in the destruction
Ned: yes indeed!!
me: and we will make a world famous documentary about it
Ned: but who do we hate in LUMS?
me: hahahaha
i dont know
Ned: well I can tell you who I hate
me: teacher x!!!
teacher y!!
Ned: yuppers!!
admin coordinator z
me: mean admin lady
(though she left)
Ned: YES MEAN ADMIN LADY!!!
but yeah she left.
Ned: no, she still comes part-time
but dude she has a kid
we can't kill her
me: oh HO
chalo we will just brainwash her
Ned: listen unfortunately ethics dictate that we can't kill people with kids or grandkids
(did I just say "ethics"?)
me: and fill her up with empathy
she will CRY in empathy everytime someone cant get a course
Ned: lol!!
yes!
listen there has to be some kind of empathy gas
we have to spray LUMS with it
everywhere
we have to fumigate LUMS with empathy gas!
me: hahahaha
turn them all into nampy pamby tree huggers
muhahahaha
Ned: or wait, there is something we could do that is actually practical. we could mix something in people's food and drinks. something that makes them all have ego deaths.
me: what is that now?
Ned: ego deaths that make them turn in spiritually evolved human beings.
not the unfeeling machines they are right now.
me: oh yes ned, this whole scheme is totally practical
Ned: (ego death is what I had on Feb 12, 2005.)
me: while we are at it, can we feed the WHOLE country this food?
Ned: no but this could happen, G.
I mean K! :P
me: i am K!!!
Ned: sowwee
ok naaa
me: tis okay
go see the mail i just forwarded you
Ned: I'm getting confused because of my excitement
K!!
ALL WE NEED IS LSD!!!
me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
thats not sustainable ned
Ned: yes it is
me: we will run out of it too soon
it will wear off
Ned: in controlled doses LSD is very effective
oh you mean that
no it seems to have permanent transformative effects on people
me: REALLY?
Ned: I was reading an article in New Scientist abou tit
*about it
me: i never knew that!
Ned: it's used in psychotherapy, K
me: wow ned
Ned: but psychedelic research was shoved under the rug in the 1970s
this is going to sound conspiracy theory-ish
me: so we just need to slip it into the chicken hawain one night
Ned: they asked him, why is it so hard to get funding for psychedelic research?
and he said, well one of the main reasons is pharmaceutical companies
see, in psychedelic therapy . . .
me: coz the man dont want us to think dude?
Ned: you basically need to administer maybe one, two or max three doses.
and then it's over.
the treatment is over.
it has dramatic effects which can be scary, but are healing.
like a mystical experience.
but the point is, you don't need to keep people on drugs.
which is not what pharmaceutical companies want
they want to keep you on drugs for the rest of your life.
me: bloody bastards
lets fumigate them too!
Ned: YES!!
LET US SPREAD THE LOVE!!
and then we will move to other countries
soon, K, we will rule the world
a brave new world of constantly doped up tree-hugging empathy-filled vegan hippies!!
me: we will have to wear haz mat suits
and we will not move to other countries
Ned: we won't?
me: we will begin with america
and get them to give us money to make a space shuttle on a satellite
and then launch empathy gas all over the world with the flick of a switch
Ned: oh wow!!
that is brilliant-e.
me: haina
Ned: but we will have to get George W really doped up on LSD first.
me: im such a practical planner
he will be our first "client"
Ned: heheheh.
me: did i mention we charge a small fee for this service?
so we are horrendously rich by the end of it
and can go to grad school
Ned: YES!!!
and we can kick the Fulbright!
me: via personal jet plane
exxxactly
hahahaha
Ned: and say, we don't need you, nanny-nanny-boo-boo!
me: hahahahaha
i think im going to blog this conversation
